Let's be frank...

To be honest I've been a little down lately, and I can't say why, exactly. At first, I thought it was because I'm coming off of some anti-depressant medication, but after more consideration, I don't think that's the reason. I've been coming off of it for almost a month now and I've felt completely "normal" (if there is such a thing, as my high school lit teacher would say) and great. Maybe it's the holidays...maybe it's the 2 week down-time from work...maybe it's my recent bouts with some soul-searching...unanswered questions, frustrating dreams, lack of routine outside of school. Yeah, I'll chalk it up to those things.

On another note, I've been meaning to write about our faculty Christmas party which was a couple of weeks ago. It was fabulous, and being around co-workers OUTSIDE of our 4 walls was refreshing and healing. We become more than our job titles. Our staff is composed of a wide range of age and ethnic groups which is enlightening on many levels. During the past year & a half at S.P. working within the African American culture, I've discovered how much more open they are in some ways. I can't really find a word to describe it, so I'll use a few: fun, accepting, brave, willful, succinct. In short, there's a lot less bullshit :) and you are accepted for who you are, where you came from. Your past is relevant in that it makes you who you are today, and not in the sense that it can be used against you. There's little shame or doubt and much more determination to do the best with what you've got. I think this has made or is making me a stronger person, someone who is more confident about how I've come to be who I am...and who I am becoming.

Now, I'm not trying to dog on white people, but it is different. I think white culture is so much more uptight, for lack of a better word. There's so much anxiety, expectation, guilt, disappointment, self-loathing. I'm not saying those things don't exist in African American culture, but it doesn't seem as prominent.

So what am I saying? I guess I'm saying I appreciate those aspects of their culture. It's helping me evolve.

Drivin' that Train

Okay, so I feel like a total schmo (define that as you please) for not posting anything in the past 2 months. I do, however, have legitimate reasons. First and foremost, I haven't had internet at home until very recently (try arguing with that one). Secondly, I've been dealing with a lot, including a move, an online course, and a puppy. So I'll break this up into categories for briefing, and more details will come later.

Move: I am, again, a resident of Riverside. I LOVE this area. Everything is within walking distance, the neighborhoods are old and therefore have tree-lined, canopied streets, and I'm only 3 miles from work. I'm in a quadriplex, and my 3 neighbors are great. I am eating up this whole living-alone-thing. I feel like I need this "selfish" me-time now more than ever.

Online course: Because I was a non-college-of-education major, I am required to take 15 credit hours of certain education courses. My cheapest option was through the University of Phoenix online. I just finished the first course (mind you, these are three-week, three credit hour courses. Ugh.). I'm all about teaching myself things, but I'm not all about paying $500+ to do that. Needless to say, I am not a fan, so far, of this whole online course thing. I'm not even sure why they have a professor facilitating it. They should just save themselves the money and have computer monitor your posts, entries, etc. It was cool getting to know some of the people, but I learn more by actually interacting with the students and professor(s).

Puppy: On Halloween, one of my 4th graders came to my room with a puppy hidden in his jacket. His homeroom teacher told him to put her back outside, but he came to me instead. He desperately wanted to keep her, but his mom wouldn't have it. So, I took her in. Samantha is about 3 months old now...I'm not sure if she's a rottie or a doberman or...? I guess it'll be a surprise. I've wanted a dog for a long time, and Sam seemed to just fall in my lap. It's fun having a puppy, but it's also teaching me a lot about patience that I haven't learned yet from teaching :) Imagine that.

More to come. And Uncle Pete, THANK YOU for keeping your blog up and running.